5-Convo "Friday" - Summarizing

Wrap it up, B

In Summer School Part 5, we looked at the difference between Directive and Reflective coaching interactions. Most coaches have more practice being Directive. We’re used to cueing, correcting, and leading athletes toward a specific result.

But Reflective? That’s trickier. So instead of 5-Play Friday, this series is 5-Convo Friday where I create some hypothetical conversations. These are loosely-based on interactions I’ve had with athletes in the past.

I highlighted 4 core skills the Motivational Interviewing framework uses:

1. Open-Ended Questions

2. Affirmations

3. Reflective Listening

4. Summarizing

In each case, the goal is to allow the athlete to steer the conversation until they make a Change Statement that indicates they want a change in outcome and understand that it will require a change in behavior. At this point, you and the athlete can then move toward Directive mode. How much of the direction comes from you and how much comes from the athlete is dependant on a lot of factors.

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This week’s skill: Summarizing.

Summarizing is like Reflective Listening’s more strategic cousin. Instead of echoing line by line, you pull the key threads together and say:

“Okay, here’s what I’m hearing.”

It gives the athlete a chance to affirm (“yes, that’s right”) or redirect (“not quite…”)—which is exactly what we want when trying to move toward a Change Statement. And the big key here is that we want the athlete to make the Change Statement, not the coach.

Here are five hypothetical conversations where a coach can use Summarizing instead of jumping in and making the Change Statement for the athlete.

Convo 1: Coming In Late

Context: A club player is a good kid and is doing well, but is always a few minutes getting on to the court.

Coach: “Hey, this is two practices this week where you’re still getting your shoes on at 8:00".”
Player: “Yeah…”
Coach: “I know you care about practice.”
Player: “I do, I just feel like I’m always getting out the door late.”
Coach: “Is there a lot on your plate right now?”
Player: “No, it’s not even that, I’m just like, a little disorganized.”
Coach: “So basically it sounds to me like you want to be ready for practice on time, you’re just not quite giving yourself time for the bunch of little things that all take 3 minutes to do.”
Player: “Yeah, honestly, I just need to put my ankle braces on in the car before I come in, that would save like 5 minutes.”

A lot of Summarizing is like the “lead the horse to water” trope. You, as an adult who presumably manages to get to places on time, realizes that if your ankle braces take 5 minutes to put on, and you start putting them on at 7:58, you’re not going to be ready to start at 8:00.

It’s okay to be more direct than this, “hey, you need to have shoes on and be on the court by 8:00.” But sometimes you might allow a little time to just summarize the situation for the player so they can have a chance to say, “yeah… I clearly need to do X and Y.”

Convo 2: Serve Receive Miscommunication

Context: An outside and a libero are having some issues passing next to each other. They are both good passers, but they aren’t handling the seam well.

Coach: “We’re having some trouble in that seam between you and Suzie.”
Player: “I know, we’re having too many miscommunications.”
Coach: “You’re both good passers.”
Player: “I know, that’s what’s making it so frustrating.”
Coach: “What’s going on?”
Player: “It’s like sometimes she’s aggressive in the seam and sometimes she’s not.”
Coach: “Seems like sometimes she’s thinking about getting set, especially in those late game situations.”
Player: “Yeah, I think I need to just get eye contact from her in those situations and tell her I’m going to take a little more.”

This is a Summarize with a little addition: the game context in which the inconsistency is happening.

Convo 3: The Setter with Too Many Voices

Context: A setter who’s hearing mixed messages from coaches and teammates. She’s starting to lose confidence in her own decisions.